4/8 (?) Chemotherapy

My new hobby:
making flowers out of ribbons

On September 6th, Tuesday, I started to feel sick as soon as I entered the hospital. My mind and body was rejecting the reality that I have to do chemo again. My WBC# was 1900, which my doctor told me that it is insufficient to do the next round of chemotherapy as usual. Instead of the chemo menu I had been doing, only one drug (drug A) with reduced amount was injected into my body. So overall it only took 15 minutes, whereas it usually takes about 5 hours.

Just because this round was a short one, it didn't make my life any better. After the chemo, I still had nausea, loss of appetite, and light fever. Interestingly, I did not have ache in my mouth; I guess it was true that each drug causes different type of side effects.

Today I'm finally feeling better enough to turn on a computer and such, but I still feel sick thinking about chemotherapy and anything relevant to it. Even just thinking about the names of chemo drugs or seeing a scene of hospital on TV makes me noxious. I wonder if this is caused psychologically? And I wonder if there is anything I can do about this. Could I somehow train my mental to not send "sick" signal to brain when I think about chemotherapy?

On the title of this post, I wrote a question mark because it wasn't a full round of chemotherapy that I'm not sure if I'll have to do more rounds to make up. I'll have to talk to my doctor again...